Thursday, July 8, 2010

Tales From The Sideline

Time for another blogfest and lots of talking beforehand. Okay, not as much talking cause it's after 1 am, I took a long time to pick a scene and had to find a new template, then reconfigure template to make it work. But isn't it pretty?

I liked the idea of the blogfest from the moment I heard about it. While the main character is the focus of the story, there are many characters on the side who have their own tales, and given the right angle they could become the main character. They are the hero of their own lives, or so one would hope. So, I was happy to sign up for the blogfest and looked forward to writing something. Then I had homework and didn't know what to write. Thus my current state of affairs. *yawns*

Let's talk a little about side characters. Then I'll get to the blogfest details and my entry. Who is a character from the "sideline"?

This can be a variety of characters. The best friend is a common one. They are a part of the tale, often in many different scenes, but they are not the focus. They can help or hinder the main character, depending on the situation, and in some situations can be secondary characters (just below the main character in status). Other ones include parents (particularly in YA), other family, bosses, employees, clients, homeless man on street, store clerks, and I hope you're getting the picture. Basically, they are often characters that are a part of the story, but a smallish part, and they can be insignificant or significant depending on the character. It is the secondary, or third or whatever place well below main, that doesn't get to be the point of view.

Point of view is important. While many books nowadays, or at least the way my old critique group saw things, there is a single point of view in both first and third person narratives. There are many books out there that have more than one point of view, but in the opinion of some there should be one. Or at least it should be limited. The character on the sideline is seen at some point by the reader but they don't see the scene through there eyes.

But times are changing, at least for one day. And that is today!

Tales from the Sideline Blogfest
Hosted by Cheree Smith at Justified Lunacy
Main rule to follow: "On Thursday July 8, post a short excert that stars a minor character. Try to keep the posts to under 1,000 words if possible."

I was going to post something from a past blogfest but written from a sideline character's perspective but couldn't pick one and that would take too much work. And I didn't want to post yest another blogfest entry from Angel//Demon and even the mutant ones are getting a little iffy. So, I struggled to make this decision but then I found the start of a romance/erotica that I work on one scene at a time. This section is from the beginning and part of the ending of my very first erotica story ever. No worries, no sex will be shown here. I wanted to write from Thomas' point of view but in a couple of spots Kyle took over. So, this is from the point of view of the new love interest... well, love might be strong at this point. Will be love in the future but ummm, I don't know what to call him in this scene. This is the morning after their first night, and Thomas' boyfriend has returned (open relationship) and is having a fit over finding a younger guy with "his man."

Warning: just an fyi but slight language usage that is more adult than my usual. I'm sure most won't care but I'm using this as my safety net. If you don't like any language used here, I warned you. ;-)

Novel: Untitled
Short Story: Halloween Without Him

Chris stared at Thomas, not giving his attention to Kyle at this point. "I can't believe you are taking his side over mine. Why are you being a bitch?"

Kyle stood with his mouth open. The sheer rude nature of the man was upsetting enough but for him to talk to Thomas like that, was too much. He took a step forward while pondering his options, unsure of what to do. His body pushed up against Thomas but he didn't go too far as just the touch delivered another glare in his direction. He wanted to bitchslap Chris but couldn't with Thomas in the way.

Thomas looked down at the ground. "I think you should leave."

"Yeah, leave." Chris snapped at Kyle.

"Actually," Thomas looked up again. "I was talking to you."

"How.. why.." Chris stumbled back, almost running into a bar stool. "But I live here."

Thomas shook his head. "Not quite. The lease is in my name. I'll let you keep your stuff here until you find somewhere else to live but we're over."

After a few minutes of standing in angered silence, Chris stormed off.

Kyle had a hard time containing his glee. The look on Chris' face just added to it. Under other circumstances, he would have felt guilt over breaking up a relationship, but he was proud of Thomas. He watched as Thomas moved into the kitchen again to grab a cup of coffee. Unable to tell if he needed comforting, he shifted his weight from one foot to the next as he watched Thomas begin to drink the hot liquid. Deciding to wait for Chris to leave, Kyle sat down to finish his own cup.

Chris stopped at the opening of the kitchen hauling a poorly packed suitcase. "Well, umm, I guess I'm going to leave."

"Okay." Thomas said without looking at him.

Once he was out of the house, Kyle set his cup down. He walked into the kitchen and wrapped his arms around Thomas, squeezing his midsection while resting his head on his chest. He listened to him breathe, slow and steady, before asking, "Are you okay?"

The response was simple. "I don't know."

8 comments:

Cheree said...

Good little scene, definitely kept me interested. It looks like you've got a great character there. Thanks for participating.

stu said...

I liked the scene, particularly the shock at the sudden throwing out.

Tricia J. O'Brien said...

Good surprise and interplay, but I was confused at first on POV (not sure through which man's eyes I was seeing this scene)That may not be a problem if it's clear in whatever preceeded this. I like the indecision at the end.

Dawn Embers said...

Cheree - Thanks. My little fan loves these two characters in particular. They are fun but I don't write them often enough.

stu - :-) Glad you liked it.

Tricia - Yeah, I know what you mean. I had a hard time picking where to start cause it's not supposed to be in Kyle's pov. Most the story is from Thomas' and I changed parts of this scene to make it from Kyle's. Thanks for the comment.

Mesmerix said...

I had some voice confusion because of the omniscient PoV you're using. It's a really hard PoV, I can't even attempt it, so kudos to you for giving it a whirl! I thought you developed the scene well and hooked the reader. If you have time, check out my entry to the blogfest. Happy writing!

Dawn Embers said...

Mesmerix - Understandable. It's supposed to be one character PoV, but since I changed it for the blogfest it does seem a bit like omniscient. Thanks for the kudos even though I wasn't actually trying for that PoV. lol

Kerri C at CK Farm said...

Nice tension! Nice job and GREAT scene!

Dawn Embers said...

Thanks Kerri C. I appreciate your comment.